Circular conversations
I really hate it when parents send their kids in to do their own work. This day this 8-9 year old kid is standing at the counter and his dad is about 5 feet behind him. “Well, go ahead and ask her!” he said and the kid meekly asks “for what?”. I don’t have time for this crap. “Your prescription” he says. I play the part and ask. “What is your name?” and he replies “Steve” (fake name by the way). Clearly we are getting nowhere. We don’t file prescriptions by first name so I address the father ” What is the patients full name please?”. He tells me. “Steven Anderson”.
I find the prescription on the shelf, one I did several hours ago. Its a new patient to ME but since I had his address on the e-script, I found one other family member (his mother), linked them up and filled the rx. Only problem was the insurance was out of date. I had filled the antibiotic for cash, about $15. I told papa, ” we need current insurance for Steven.” to which he told me “You have it on file”.
I truly hate it when people tell me this. ”On file” could mean anything. His mother was the only patient in our system and the last time she was here was in 2008. Clearly ON FILE was synonymous with “nothing ever changes!”. I had to tell papa that Steve was a new patient and the ONLY other family member’s insurance was expired. The price is $15 or I need a new insurance card. To that, he informed me he didn’t carry the card with him. WTF? its a 2×3 piece of plastic, keep it in your wallet!
And so I went to the cash register and run up the $15 to which he looked at me incredulously. ” I have insurance!”. “And you do not have the card with you, so it is $15.00″. I politely replied. He put his hands on the counter and said “And DON’T YOU BILL AETNA?” –this guy was from the slow class, clearly.– I said. ” Yes I bill Aetna and a thousand other plans, but I need your card. Without the card that you said you do not have, I cannot bill this prescription for anything but cash.” “Bring me the card and I will bill Aetna or whomever is their provider”.
How stupid can people be? Can I walk into the grocery store, pick out a grocery cart full of items, walk thru the checkstand, and ask “DON’T YOU TAKE VISA?” but refuse to provide the card because ” I dont carry it?”. Steve just stood there (as I would expect an clueless 8 year old to do) as his father finally paid the bill. I began to provide the necessary counsel to which he said ” Tell HIM”, pointing to Steve. Sorry buddy, I am not counseling an 8 year old kid. I pretended he was joking (haha), ignored his statement and continued to tell him about proper storage, usage, discard and side effects.
And, wished them both a good day.
Poor kid.